In Those Eyes
by Cullens-ImmortalyMe
Summary: When Bella is tired of feeling like her love for Edward is one sided,and Edward loves Bella but is too afraid to admit it, both take steps individually and together to see where it leads them...AU/Human,canon pairings,E/B A/J E/R C/E OFFICIALLY ON HIATUS.
1. prologue

Author's note! **BE GENTLE PLEASE! This is my very first Fic and I'm very nervous about what you lovely readers may think…**

**Well enough of this chitchat! On to the first chapter of In Those Eyes!**

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"You wanna go out tonight or something?" Alice asked me while she waited for me to spill details about my 'boyfriend'. I never understood her infatuation with my personal life, or anyone else's for that matter. Alice, my best friend- my crazy and way too hyper, but loving best friend- really didn't care what people thought about her opinions…but I did…

I completely forgot that Alice was sitting on my bed starring at me when I began to become lost in my flashback to earlier today. I was standing near my truck. It was pouring rain and I was getting soaked. I heard the faint sound of water plashing behind me as someone began to approach. I could smell them before I saw. The sweet smell of honey and spice, and something else I cant quit describe hit me. I immediately knew who it was. Edward…

" Why are you standing here?" He questioned.

" I'm just…lost…" I said

" Bella…" He replied. " You're not lost. You know exactly where you are…"

He was extremely puzzled and I could help but chuckle slightly internally.

" Why are you here Edward?"-I blurted out with ought even meaning to, and immediately shut up.

He looked down at me questioningly but still very seriously. Yes, it was the same seriousness that got me into this situation. The same seriousness that made me love him… The intensity of his stare made my knees grown weak and my skin tingle. I didn't know what to do or say.

" What do you mean '_why am I here_'?" He almost looked insulted…almost.

I looked him in the eyes and asked again, " Why are you here?"

" I saw your truck and I stopped to see if you were alright." I could tell that he was choosing his words very carefully. Though, I couldn't figure out why.

" Why did you stop just to check on me?" I felt a little bad for grilling him with so many questions that he probably felt awkward answering but I wanted to hear what I _needed_ to hear. And suddenly there it was…that face. The face that made me wonder what he was really feeling behind those eyes- _those_ eyes always made me melt in skin and fall apart right in front of him. And even though I tried my hardest to conceal it, I knew he always saw right through my efforts-

" I came because I was worried about you." He said with a certain tenderness in his voice. It made my heart ache.

" Why?" I pressed.

" Because I Lov…look after you. You're like the biggest hazard in this whole town, no the world."

The way he covered up the word love didn't go unnoticed by me…And at that moment in time I realized something- It was something that I sure as hell was not expecting to hear. Granted he didn't say what he was about to but what he said was _enough_.- I realized that Edward loved me. He would never tell me to my face but the way he felt about me was now obvious in his. God knows that I love him. I would travel the face of the earth if it meant that he would tell me that. He was hurting. His poor heart has undergone so much that he is scared to love…scared to love me.

At that moment I was pulled out of my reverie by Alice.

"Bella!" she yelled, waving her arms in my face in order to bring me back to the present. When she got my attention I just starred up at her cute pixie face with extremely emotional eyes. Showing the emotion that her brother had caused me.

'I have to speak to him' I thought. And with that I was on the verge of tears…again.

**Yes? No? Let me know! I'll only update if I get good or bad feedback! Love ya! **


	2. Car rides and Whores

**A/N Hey lovely, lovely readers! I appreciate all of you who are reading and taking the time for my story! I swear that this chapter will be better than the owns all characters! Even Edward ='~(…*sigh* anyways time to get to it! Love ya! ~~ili**

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I woke up feeling more than _a little groggy_. If I must put it bluntly I would say I felt like _shit_. For many reasons actually. One: back to school. Two: my truck is in the shop (_again_), so no driving myself. And three: Alice-my all too loving and all too hyper best friend- told her brother that I needed a ride. Edward was picking me up…Alice has always known…she knows everything. She has spent the past few years plotting on how to get Edward and I to 'hook up'. I mean I love Ali but she can be a little overwhelming at times. Okay, she can be a lot of overwhelming _all_ the time!

Her newest scheme involved Edward, his Volvo, and my lack of my truck, hence the absence of a ride to school this I finished getting ready I suddenly heard a horn being honked from outside my window on the second story. I looked out even though I knew who it would be. I knew because of course Alice told me, and I could feel _his_ presence just about anywhere."Shit." I muttered. This was going to be a long day.I ran downstairs and flung the front door open as I made my way to his shiny Volvo. I actually was feeling nervous. Not that I didn't know that feeling was coming, but it still made me feel odd as I walked down the driveway to the parked car and opened the door on the passenger's side.

"Hey you" He smiled, the smile that almost made me forget my name. "Hey" I said. He didn't continue so I started again.

"Thanks again for driving m-" He cut me off."Bella, don't even worry about it. What else are friends for?"" Yea. Friends" I said feeling disheartened that yet again he referred to me as his _friend_. I mean, I know that it was juvenile to feel that way but it was hard not to. I obviously had very strong emotions towards Edward. But, he would never see them in me. Ever…The ride to school was quiet. Just as I expected it to be…"Hey, what's up with you? You look like you've seen Satan" He said chuckling at his own words.

I understood his observation because if I looked anything like how I was feeling I'd be worried too. At the moment I felt nauseated, because I was so nervous. I mean, I've known Edward since I was eight and I shouldn't feel nervous or scared around him, but I always did…I was so wrapped up in my own thoughts that I forgot that he had spoken to me. In a fluster I hastily looked up and mumbled-

"I'm okay. I'm just thinking about…things." I wasn't just thinking about _things_. I was thinking about _Edward. _"What kind of things?" He asked curiously."ummm…" I couldn't think of anything to say without giving myself away, so I decided to fight back against his questions.I looked at him intensely and almost fainted as his eyes met mine. I couldn't find my breath when I said-

" Why do you wanna know Cullen? Worried what I'll think about you?" I asked with a sort of cute smirked before saying, " Bella, I'll always worry about what you think of me."Just those words alone made my knees grow weak. It was a good thing I was sitting down. I wondered briefly if he was just joking or if he actually meant it. No, he had to be joking. There was no way in hell that Edward cared about what I-of all people- thought of him. Impossible…"Does that mean that mean that my opinion is high in your mind?" I teased. He stammered before he said " um…yes?"I laughed freely and it felt nice to. It felt great to be loose with him and act like myself. When I wasn't nervous around him I was beaming. He could make feel better just with his presence.

That's why I love him…_whoa! Hold on there! Love? _I couldn't _love _Edward…could I?…-No. the answer was no! I couldn't. I didn't." HaHa" I chuckled. " Good to know Cullen…good to know."And with that we were pulling in to the school's parking lot. I was a little miffed that my time with Edward was over. For now that is. He hopped out of the car and came to my side and opened the door for me. He was such a gentleman. _Sigh._

"Thanks" I said as he helped me out."No problem." He said smiling that heart clenching then I was off to class. This was going to be a tough day. Very tough and boring…who knows it just may be interesting… day started off extremely boring. I went to my morning classes but barely paid attention to much of anything. By the time lunch came I desperately needed a distraction to keep my thoughts off of Edward. As I entered the cafeteria, could see Alice waving frantically at me from our table.

" Bella! Over here!" she called. I walked slowly and a little unsteadily towards the table where Alice, Jasper, Emmett, and Rosalie were sitting…but not _him._"Um…where's *_cough_* Edward?" I asked uneasily. Alice gave me a questioning look before she pointed over to her right and hesitantly answered, "over there.""Oh" was all that I replied. What was he doing over there? And why was he talking to _Tanya_? Wasn't she just the school pass around? She was no where near being deserving of Edward. Or even deserving of just his presence alone.

" Oh, umm, I see he's, ugh, talking to Tanya…" I could barely make the words leave my mouth. I hoped that no one would think too much of my slip gave me a knowing look that almost instantly made me grow rigid. _Uh oh…_" Yea, they're going on a date tonight." she answered a little hesitantly. _Shit_…she knows.

"Oh…good for him." I said then chuckled nervously. _A date_? Why is he dating _her? _So, he'll date Tanya the slut but he won't date me? What the fuck? Well, I can't say that I can blame him. I mean, I'm nothing special…at all. And Tanya was the school bicycle, she let everyone have a ride. "Yeah, but I mean it's nothing serious!" Alice answered in a rush, obviously trying to placate me."Well I guess only time can tell…" I suddenly felt kind of sad and I had to work to keep the fake smile on my face.I made it through a whole lunch period and managed to only look over to where Edward and his newly found slut were sitting for the day, and if things went well…the rest of the school year. I cringed at that thought. I didn't want to see him with anyone else besides me. When he drove me home after school I was going to ask him about _her_. Even though I wanted to know nothing about her.

_**A/N: Well I hope you liked this chapter. It was a bit longer. It takes me some time to write. Mostly this chapter took a while because it was a holiday…which reminds me, HAPPY 4TH**** OF JULY! I know that this only applies to you American readers but hey, what the hell? Might as well just say it to everyone! =~) So see you soon for another chapter! AND MUCH MUCH MUCH LOVE TO MY BETA BRYONY (MRS. EDWARD B. CULLEN)! THE ONLY REASON THAT THIS CHAPTER IS UP TODAY IS BECAUSE I SENT HER THE CHAPTER AND SHE CORRECTED, ADDED HER OPINIONS, AND SENT IT BACK ALL IN THE SAME DAY! THANK YOU! ~ILI**


	3. The day only gets better

**A/N: So here is the chapter. Sorry if you think it took long. Well in this chapter there may be some fluff. I did say maybe. I'm really not sure but let's just see where my heart leads me on this one. Adios for now and see me below for some end of chapter chatting =~) **

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In the car ride back home after school with Edward I asked him about Tanya. Even though I didn't want to I knew I had to for my own personal reasons. I knew it was none of my business who he dates, but it is my business at the same time.

" So, I hear you have a date with Tanya." I asked fiddling with my fingers, trying to avoid eye contact. I was too afraid to look at him while I made my observation. As I glanced up at him from under my lashes, a look of shock flooded his gorgeous features before he responded. " Who told you that?" He had an actual look of confusion on his face at that point.

" um…Alice?" It came out more like a question than an answer. But then I wanted to protect Alice so I hurriedly said, "plus like everyone has been talking about it."

He was silent. I cautiously glanced sideways at his face. Only to find a look of amusement on his face. I was confused as I asked, " what's so funny?" He then chuckled and said " Bella, I'm not going on a date with Tanya. That's just a stupid rumor that she probably spread herself." He continued to chuckle.

I sighed quietly in relief. He's not going out with Tanya. Maybe that means I might have a chance after all…WHOAH slow down there Bella. There is no way in hell that Edward would ever like or date you. Impossible. He wouldn't even waste a day of his time to look at you in a 'more than a friend' kind of way. I knew this was true but one could still hope right?

" So…you don't like her?" after I asked I wished that I hadn't. I didn't need him decoding the meaning behind my question. I would be humiliated because I was sure that I would be turned down if he ever found out my feelings for him.

" No" He replied hastily. Maybe even a little too quickly.

"Oh" I simply said. I wondered why he doesn't like her? I mean she is beautiful. Well she was at least a hell of a lot prettier than I'll ever be. My thoughts were interrupted when I heard him speak again.

" So why did you want to know about Tanya and I? Wanna know if I'm single so you can have me all to yourself Swan?" He was laughing after that so instead of feeling nervous, I actually began to laugh too, able to make a joke out of the whole situation.

" You wish Cullen!" I was still laughing as I said this. But I was not expecting his next words.

"Yea, I do…" he said in a day dreamy voice. Almost like his mind was far away.

" What?" I asked stunned. He shot his head up quickly and barely looked at me as he said, " Oh um, nothing." He had said it so quickly that I barely had time to register his words. But before I could question why he said what he said we pulled up in front of my house. We said goodbye and I thanked him once again for the ride.

I stumbled and very nearly fell over as I rushed out of Edward's car. I never in all of the time that I have known him have I ever felt so relieved to be away from him. That was the most awkward thing that I have ever experienced with Edward. And I knew that I couldn't let it happen again if I valued my sanity. God! Why couldn't any of this just be easy for me! I hate my life.

Later that night I was in my room with Alice for our sleepover. Ugh I hated our sleepovers sometimes, because Alice always knew when something was going on. And she hated to be the last to know. But, in this particular case she had already known…damn it.

" So…" When she started like this I knew it was bad. She was approaching a topic that I wanted to forget once and for all. But of course Alice wouldn't let it go. I was sure of it. I didn't respond so she continued. " When my brother got home today he looked like hell. All he could mutter was ' shit, shit, shit' under his breath. And when I asked him about you he just snapped and told me to ' stop digging around in his shit'. I didn't let it bother me too much." she gave me a weird look and continued, " So it got me thinking…"

Shit, Shit, Shit! Holy hell what is she going to say? Please don't ask. Please don't ask. Please don't ask. I chanted to myself mentally. Alice just starred at me. Of course I knew she would ask. She wanted me to ask what she was thinking, and that sure as hell was not happening.

After a moment of pause, she just rolled her eyes at the ceiling and continued. " It got me thinking about what the hell happened with you and him in that car?"

At that moment I felt sick to my stomach. I found myself waiting for her to look away so I could make a run for it. But of course that could never be possible with Alice. I had only one choice. To suck it up and stick it out.

" So Bella, are you going to answer me or not!" I looked at her and tried denying everything. But apparently she wasn't having that. " Oh, cut the crap Bella! I know something happened between you two. Now spill." she said in a very hard and demanding voice.

I caved under her glare. I told her everything that happened in the car. _Everything. _Every word. Every look. I couldn't believe the pain in my voice as I spoke about it. But what did I feel pain for? I know why. It was the fact that I could never have him. Ever.

After I was done spilling my guts out to Alice, she hugged me briefly and yanked out her cell phone. " who are you calling?" I asked just short of panic.

" Rose." she simply answered before she continued after a moment. " and…Edward. Now Bella before you kill, it's for a good reason." I just gaped at her. I didn't know what to say. I was just sort of lost in my own mind until I heard a few quick rasps at the door. " Rose is here!" Alice beamed before running out of my room and down the stairs to get the door. Charlie wasn't here so we didn't have to worry about 'keeping it down. He was at Billie's house tonight. Something about a late night game on T.V and a very early fishing trip. I didn't question it.

When Alice returned Rose was in tow behind her. " Hey Sweet cheeks." Rose said smiling. I smiled back but my smile quickly faded when I saw who had just entered my bedroom behind Rosalie. Edward? What was he doing here? Alice!

" Edward. What are you doing here?" I asked nervously.

" Um Alice invited me. Plus, Rose kind of needed a ride. So here I am." he chuckled nervously.

" Oh. Okay." was all I replied.

" I can leave if you guys just want some girl time" he was already letting himself out when Alice screamed. " Oh no you don't Mr.! You're staying right here until I say so."

He smirked playfully and teased Alice. " this is Bella's house you know. And if she wants me to leave it's her choice." In a second everyone was looking at me waiting for my response. " You can stay Edward. You won't be bothering anyone if you stayed. In fact I wish you'd stay." Wait, what did I just say?

I panicked until Edward opened his mouth and said, " Well I'm glad. Because I'm staying." he winked at me and my face must have turned forty different shades of red.

" awww, can we play a game or something before I die of boredom?" I nodded and asked " what game?"

Rose grinned and said " spin the bottle" I got scared instantly. Thank God that Alice intervened. " Rose we can't play spin the bottle! We only have one guy. And he's my brother!" Alice exclaimed animatedly.

" Oh relax Ali. I meant question spin the bottle anyways."

" What?" Edward asked. Rose just gave him a look as if he was stupid and said, "Question spin the bottle is basically the same concept, but without the kissing. Okay, let's say that I spin the bottle and it lands on Alice. I then have to ask her a question and she has to answer. No questions asked. So do you get it now?"

We all just nodded in understanding. Rose looked at us with a devious smirk on her face. " Great! Let's get started. Alice, you go first."

Yep. Rosalie was up to something. And I was scared out of my ass to find out what that _something_ was. Sigh. 'this should be fun' I thought to myself as Alice grabbed the bottle.

**A/N: So that was an interesting Chapter huh? Leave me a review! I still don't know if I am going to continue this story, and reviews just might make me continue. **

**Anyways…See you next week (Hopefully) for an update. A huge thank you needs to be given to my lovely Beta Bryony! I wouldn't have this story be where it is if it weren't for her. **

**Love ya**

**~ili**


	4. That Damn Bottle

A/N: OKAY HERE IS THE EPOV THAT I HAVE BEEN ASKED FOR. NO JACOB. YET. I'M STILL THINKING ABOUT HOW HE'S GOING TO FIT INTO THE STORY LINE. SUGGESTIONS ARE VERY WELCOME INDEED. AND I GIVE CREDIT TO ALL OF MY SOURCES! SO, READ,REVIEW, AND FAVORITE!

DISLAIMER! I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT! ALL BELONGS TO SM. I DON'T OWN EDWARD. OR EMMETT ='( …I KNOW, I KNOW IT'S SAD. BUT, ON THE BRIGHT SIDE, I CAN MAKE THEM DO WHATEVER I(OR YOU) WANT IN THIS STORY. MUAHAHAHAHA.

AND I PROMISE I'LL SHUT UP AFTER THIS LAST STATEMENT! : THANKS TRUCKLOADS TO MY BETA BRYONY! MAKE SURE YOU THINK OF HER WHEN YOU READ EVERY SINGLE CHAPTER! NO ON WITH THE FOOTAGE!

This should be fun. I thought to myself as we found a bottle and were about to begin the game. This was all Rosalie's idea but Alice went right along with it. The only person I saw with worry or doubt in their eyes was Bella. I really couldn't blame her though, because I was sort of feeling the same way.

Alice declared that she was to go first. And to be honest I really didn't give a shit who went first as long as it wasn't me. I knew Alice and Rose very well, and to be honest I didn't trust them one bit at times like this one. It was obvious in their eyes that they were both up to something. They both wore a look that was a mixture of intense and amusement, while Bella, Sweet Bella, wore a look of worry and anxiety. Poor girl.

" okay, I'm spinning!" yelled Alice. Damn, and so it begins. I watches as Alice enthusiastically spun the bottle on Bella's floor, where we were all sitting in a circle. I was in between Alice and Rose and was sitting across Bella, facing her.

The bottle landed straight on Rose. I let out an internal sigh of relief. Glad that it wasn't me that had to face Alice's over enthusiasm first. But I had a feeling that they were working with one another against Bella and I, so Alice might not be as hard on Rose. But who knows. It was just a hunch.

"So Rose, before I give you your question I think you should know that I'm adding another rule," she said with a smirk. " And what would that rule be?" Rose retorted with a smirk of her own this time. Alice began again, " the rule is that if you refuse to answer the question that is given to you, you have to accept a dare by the person who spun the bottle. No questions asked. Got it?" Rose just looked amused even further, as to where I almost jumped out of Bella's second story window myself at that condition. Of course they were up to something.

" Got it." Rose stated smugly.

"okay then. You're question is…where was the best place that you and Emmett made out?" Alice knew that that wasn't a hard question at all. Which is why I'm sure she asked it.

" Oh, that's easy. Your bathroom." I burst out laughing. It was funny because I knew that Alice most likely wouldn't like the fact that her best friend and our brother did some heavy petting in her bathroom.

Alice just grimaced and said, " I'll kill you both for that later, but now the game must go on." Bella was still chuckling as she said this. Her laugh was so cute. Stop it Cullen! Stop thinking about her. God, I had lost my balls. And want to know the worst part? I didn't even really care as much as I should have.

" Okay, Rose since you answer the question last you get to spin." Alice said. Rose grabbed the bottle and I watched it spin until it landed right on Bella, who had been quiet for quit some time. I felt sorry that she had to face Rose's questions.

" Yea, I got Bella!" Rose exclaimed excitedly. " okay so Bella, your question is…" she made a drum role sound on her thighs before continuing. " who is the last person that has asked you out and when?"

Bella's facial expression went from horrified to annoyed in an instant. I wondered why the sudden change in emotion but I didn't dwell, because I was too damn curious to find out who the hell had asked her out. If anyone did. What the hell was I saying? Of course someone had to have asked her out. She was fucking beautiful.

" Bella, we're waiting. Care to share? 'Cause if you don't you'll have to take that dare. And I'm sure you don't want a dare from Rose." Alice said matter of factly.

" Fine. It was after third period in the parking lot next to my truck. Mike asked me to a movie and dinner. Happy?"

What? Mike ' faggot' Newton asked her out? I mean, I knew the guy liked her. He's had it for her since the seventh grade, but I always thought he was too much of a pussy to actually do something about it. I was so curious now as to what her answer to him was. And before I could stop myself I slipped and asked, " what did you say?" Fuck where the hell was my filter today? First the incident in the car with Bella earlier, and now this! I've just been saying whatever was on my mind today.

Bella looked stunned and hesitated before answering. God, I was nervous. What if she said yes? Stop it! If she said yes, then she said yes. She doesn't fucking belong to you. You aren't allowed to get angry or jealous if she's with another guy. Damn Cullen, get a fucking grip.

" Umm…No. I said no. I just don't like Mike in that way." For a brief moment she looked up and our eyes met for only about two seconds, before she looked away blushing. I let go a silent breath of relief. I was angry at myself at the fact, that hearing that she had simply said no to a date offer had made me so fucking happy.

"okay! So now you have to spin Bella!" Alice nearly screamed.

I watched as Bella grabbed the bottle and spun it. I watched it spin round and round until it stopped. Right on me…fuck.

" Alright Bella, you know the rules. Ask Eddie boy over here a question." Rose said with a huge grin taking over her face. Damn, here we go.

Bella looked scared almost. I think she was just nervous. Hell, I knew she was nervous. After the day we had we both were. We had no reason not to be. I just hoped she would be nice to me.

" Okay then. Edward." she stated while looking dead at me. I felt like my heart and stomach had leapt up into my throat. It was an unwelcome feeling.

" You're question is…If you _had_ to ask one girl from school on a date, who would it be?"

Shit! She had to ask that question. Bella, of all people! There was no way that I would be able to answer that question. I mean, what was I going to say? '_Oh I'm actually glad that you asked that question Bella, because I was just wondering if you would like to go out with me? Oh, and would you mind being my girlfriend and love me, and deal with all my shit? 'Cause it would mean a lot'. _

No! Not happening.

" Um, I can't answer that because I actually don't know how to. I don't know who I would want at the moment." Besides you. I mentally added. " I guess you'll have to give me that dare".

Bella actually looked a tad bit disappointed in my response, but she didn't let it show too long before she responded.

" Oh. Okay. Umm…I actually can't think of a dare at the moment. Alice? Can you make up a dare in my honor?" she chuckled lightly. I grew terrified because the extreme look of excitement on Alice's face let on that she was up to no good. Shit…

" okay Edward. You're dare is that…" she paused to think of said dare. " You have to take one of these lovely three ladies sitting around near you, to a nice night out. Alone. The choice is all yours Edward. Me, Rose, or Bella" she made a gesture towards Bella as she spoke her name. That sneaky pixie. I knew she was up to something from the start.

Dammit! I wasn't going to take my sister. Weird. And I wasn't going to take my brothers girlfriend. And to be honest I didn't want to take any one of them. I only wanted to take one girl. Can you guess who it was?

So with no further questions I said, " Alright Bella. You. Me. Dinner tomorrow night. I'll text or call you with the details." I smiled at her and she blushed her beautiful blush.

" Okay." She said shyly. Could this become more than just a dare? Secretly, I strongly hoped it would. But what if Bella didn't want that? It was her choice. Always her choice. She seemed to own my balls. She always has…

I swear I saw Alice and Rose do a, not so discreet, high five.

**A/N: THANKS FOR ALL THE REVIEWS! NOT! 3 REVIEWS? COME ON PEOPLE! I'M ONLY GOING TO CONTINUE IF I GET REVIEWS…IF NOT THIS IS THE LAST CHAPTER. **

**ANYWAYS…THANKS YET AGAIN TO MY BETA BRYONY! SHE NEVER DISSAPOINTS. =D **

**~ILI**


	5. Beautiful Misfortune

**HEY GUYS! IF YOU GUYS HAVE STUCK WITH ME THIS LONG THAN I MUST THANK YOU. I CAN PROMISE THAT THE STORY WILL GET BETTER FROM NOW ON!**

**OKAY SO, IN THE LAST CHAP. I SAID THAT IF I DIDN'T GET REVIEWS THAN I WASN'T GOING TO CONTINUE WRITING. OBVIOSLY I WAS TOO WEAK TO LEAVE IT BEHIND…SO HERE'S ANOTHER CHAPTER. OH, AND IT'S WAY LONGER THIS TIME. YAY!**

**NO COPY WRITE INFRINGEMENT IS INTENDED! ALL OF THE CHARACTERS BELONG TO STEPHANIE MEYER…I OWN NOTHING. *SNIFFLES AND TEARS***

**ANYWAYS…ENJOY AND MEET ME DOWN BELOW AFTERWARDS!**

_Okay, today is the day! _I thought to myself as I stepped into the shower. Today is the day that I go to dinner with Edward Cullen. It's not a date but I can pretend, right?

No. I can't pretend. Whenever I pretend I tend to confuse my imagination and reality. I cannot ever let that happen with Edward. At least not again.

It happened once before about two years back. It was freshman year and Edward and I were forced to go get ice cream together. Courtesy of Alice, of course. While we sat and ate ice cream I took a trip to Fantasy Land. In Fantasy Land I was hold Edward's hand while sitting in his lap. I indeed forgot to return to reality, because I heard someone faintly calling my name, calling me out of my romantic reverie. It was Edward.

When I looked down I saw that my finger tips had been brushing up and down his forearms. He had asked me if I was alright then looked down at my hand on his arm.

I was mortified. But Edward. Edward looked almost _nervous. _He was blushing. Edward Cullen was blushing!

As I let the steam from the shower relax me I thought about how I could never let that happen again. I know that that day could have been much worse, but it also could have gone a whole lot better.

I turned off the water to check the time. It was six thirty. Edward had texted me this morning telling me to be ready by seven thirty. Apparently, he had reservations to a restaurant but wouldn't tell me which one. It was supposed to be a 'surprise', and all I knew was the time he was going to pick me up and how to dress.

Alice came by this morning shortly after Edward had texted me with a huge bag in her hand. Why me? I took the bag and started up the stairs, with minimal complaints. I heard Alice squeal behind me, before following me up to my room.

She grabbed the bag from me and took out it's contents. I'll admit I was scared to see them. But, this was Alice we're talking about! You would be too.

Alice pulled out a ivory/gold beautiful strapless dress. It was tight around the chest and torso, but flared out around the hips. It was short but elegant. I actually wanted to put it on. Until, Alice pulled out the shoes to match. They were way too high. More than four inches, maybe even five.

I groaned aloud and Alice looked at me.

" what's wrong Bella? You don't like the dress?" she asked sadly.

"No, Alice, I love the dress. It's gorgeous. But, the shoes will kill me. I fall wearing my converse!" I was on the verge of a freak out and I didn't know why!

Then it occurred to me. I wanted everything to go perfectly tonight with Edward. I wanted to look beautiful. I wanted his jaw to drop when I opened my front door to meet him. I wanted him to hold out his arm for me. I wanted him to think I was beautiful. I wanted him to walk me to my door and kiss me goodnight. I wanted to not be clumsy for just this one night.

" Look, Bella, I know you're nervous but you don't have to be. There is obviously a reason why Rose and I did this." I wasn't shocked to hear that she and Rosalie were the ones to set this up. I knew it anyways because it was typical Alice and Rose.

When I didn't continue, Alice did.

" I mean, I just don't see how you two don't feel one-hundred-percent comfortable with each other by now. You guys have only known each other for the better part of your lives! It's like when I'm in the same room as the two of you, I can feel the tension rolling of you."

She took a brief pause to glare at me, and began again. Or rather continued. _Sigh._

"Tonight is supposed to be a great thing. It was supposed to open doors and make you two become closer!" I was confused by her ranting. Why was she speaking in the past tense? I decided to actually voice what I was thinking in that moment.

" Ali, why are you speaking in past tense? What do you keep saying '_supposed to be_'? The night hasn't even begun yet."

She looked worried. In fact she was freaking out. It was making me anxious just watching her flip her lid, and I didn't even know what it was about.

Alice tapped her fingers against he lips nervously before speaking up.

" I just have a really bad feeling about tonight. I just feel like you guys should just call the whole thing off. I'm feeling ridiculously scared, and I don't even know why!"

She sighed in defeat when I told her to calm down and just _breath_. " Ali, I'm sure that everything will go just fine. Nothing is going to happen." _I hope_…

%0~%~0%

After Alice had recovered and had Jasper come pick her up and drive her home, I was able to relax a little again as. Until I realized that Edward would be at my doorstep in just a short while. It was seven-fifteen, and that meant that Edward would be here in fifteen minutes. All sense of calm that I had regained was gone, along with my confidence.

I rushed to put on my death trap shoes, and purse from my closet. When I glanced at the clock again it was seven-thirty-one. Edward should be here right about now…

I heard a _Ding-Dong_ and then a few swift rasps at the door.

I rushed to the door, before pausing to fluff my hair, smooth my dress, check my makeup, etc…

I opened the door only to see a gorgeous and extremely well dressed Edward. He was wearing black straight leg, _almost _skinny jeans. (I say almost because they were a tad bit looser). With an all black button down shirt and black tie. Let's just say that the color black suits him well.

I couldn't form any words, but I began to feel better when I looked up to see Edward starring agape at me. Well I guess my outfit. Would he stare at me like that? God, I'm such an idiot sometimes.

Edward was the one who broke the silence, because obviously I wasn't going to do it.

" Wow Bella, you look amazing. Are you sure you can walk in those heels though?" He joked.

When I finally found my voice, I responded, " Thanks, you too. Oh, and no. I doubt I can walk with these" I wiggled my foot in the air as I explained.

" Well then, I'll just have to stay close to you the whole night. You know, just to make sure you don't hurt yourself " He winked. Holy shit, was Edward _flirting_ with _me?_

Damn I hope he really was flirting. Because, that would show a sign of interest wouldn't it?… Oh! I forgot that he was waiting for me to respond…

" Yea, _just_ so I don't fall." I retorted as he held out his arm to me. Which, I took more than willingly. As he led me to the car, I expected to see his Volvo. But what I saw in front of me was his Aston Martin. Damn that was his sexy car. In fact it was probably the sexiest car on the planet. I was stunned because, Edward only took that car if he wanted to make an impression, or if he just felt like taking it for a spin.

" Edward, you brought the _Vanquish?_" I asked exasperated. How could I not? I was freaking shocked. Edward probably loved this car more than his mother, Esme. Well we all know that's not true, but still.

Esme was Edward's reason to get up in the morning. He loved his mother more than life itself. I would never know what it feels like to be loved like that. And I wanted it. Wanted it so badly, that as much as I loved Esme, I envied her for that love. I knew it was wrong to feel that way, because Esme was like my own mother. She had always been that way…

" Yep, just thought that it would complete the scenario. Plus, I know you love it." he winked yet again at me. I could feel the blush in my cheeks and chest arise. Damn him for making me feel this way!

I didn't want to stay silent so I decided to give it right back to him.

" please, you know that you like to think that I love it. It makes you feel like a man. Makes you feel powerful. doesn't it?" I smirked at him while he just returned the same smirk. Except it was way to gorgeous to me mine.

" You know, you're very snippy today. Like I kitten trying to be a lion." He said smugly. I had to respond to that.

" yea well, I thing I'm more of a tiger anyways…"

He just smirked at me and ushered me into the car. I was afraid to touch anything in the car, in fear of messing anything up.

We sat in awkward silence for a while before curiosity got to me.

" where are we going?" I asked.

" umm, I wasn't going to tell you but…we're going to this French restaurant that Carlisle told me about."

" what's it called?" I asked.

He just smiled and looked at me with his brilliant eyes and said, " Wow Bella, you ask a lot of questions. But I must tell you that I lied. We're not going to a restaurant. We're going on Carlisle's boat on the harbor."

" Is that also a lie?" I asked jokingly.

" No, that Bella is the honest truth." Something in the way he said it make me melt in my shoes. He said it with such intensity, passion almost.

" Okay then, what are we waiting for?" I said in a breathless voice as I looked out the window to see that we were there.

He smiled a soft smile and said, " Let's go."

He opened my door for me and offered me his arm. As he led us to the boat, I couldn't help but think that this was a very intimate time for us. The deal was that he only really had to take me somewhere special. Granted that this was very special, but a date at the diner could also be considered special.

This was a night on his father's boat. I just wanted to hug him and never let go when he led me on the deck of the ship. It was beautiful. On the wooden floor there were lights installed under so that you were walking on them. Then the stairs leading down to the under level, where there was a bed, bathroom, a small kitchen, and a small refrigerator. There was a chandelier hanging over the bed. It lit up the whole room. It was absolutely gorgeous.

" Edward this is…this is, beautiful." I could barely get the words out of my mouth.

" I thought you would think so." he said proudly.

" But, why here? Why not somewhere more public?" As soon as I asked, I wished that I hadn't. But he didn't seem fazed by it.

" Because I know you Bella. I have for most of my life, and I know me. I knew that you would enjoy this much more than a restaurant. And, frankly I knew that I would too. I mean, it would have been fun with you no matter where we went, but I just wanted to…"

He was rambling. I could sense that he was worried about something, but didn't know what. In order to stop his rambling, I gave a peck on the cheek. A brave move on my part.

" Thank you Edward. This is lovely. And, yes, you do know me."

He looked stunned at first, but soon he came around. He grazed he fingers over where I had kissed him. We were just looking at each other, not saying anything.

" Okay well, um we have mini sandwiches." He smiled like a kid when he said it. As he went to go get the food I checked my phone. It was eight-forty-five. Time was passing quickly, and I knew that I would have to make the best of the time that we had left.

We joked while we ate. We laughed and smiled, and it felt good to be this way with Edward. If I had the choice of staying this way with him forever, I would make it.

We cleaned up after we finished eating, and Edward went down the stairs into the room to put the basket away in the fridge. When he came back he had a small smile on his face. He walked slowly towards where I was still standing. I was leaning against the wood railing looking at him while he came to the front of me. Edward put both hands on either side of me, holding onto the railing.

My breathing hitched when he flashed his all too familiar smile at me.

" So, how do you like the weather tonight?" he said, chuckling.

I had to laugh at his way random comment. " The weather? Really Edward? Hmm, sometimes I wonder if you say and ask random things because you don't really want to talk to me."

A look of amusement and a bit of shock covered his face before he spoke up again.

" Bella, I always want to talk to you. I've known you since I was six, our mothers are best friends, and you're Alice's best friend. You're like one of the best friends I've ever had. And I never want to lose that."

Wow. His statement had been full of emotion. Sadness maybe? But, why would he be sad? If anyone was going to be sad, it was me. He said it himself that I was his _friend. _I was just his friend, and It made me sad. Just like it always has.

" Wow. Edward I know. I was just kidding when I said that." I smiled sincerely.

" I know… Uh, so anyways…" why did he look so…annoyed? Angry? Confused? Frustrated? Nervous? Worried?

All of these emotions crossed his face, all in the course of thirty seconds. What was going on inside his head right now? What I wouldn't give to know…

He continued before I got the change to ask him to. " So, Newton asked you out huh?"

That was all? He looked so torn up because he wanted to know if Mike really asked me out?

" Um, yea." I stated as simply as I could.

" Why did you say no to him Bella?" he said, sounding breathless.

" uh…umm…because I just don't like him as more than a friend. I can't date someone that I have no feelings for. I just can't. I couldn't have said yes. I mean it would have eaten me alive knowing that I'm leading someone on that I have no intentions of staying with."

I realized that I was rambling and took a deep, long breath to calm myself. When I looked back up at Edward, he had a small smile on his face. Why was he smiling? Did I say something wrong or amusing during my rambling?

" Bella, it's okay. I understand your reasoning. It's the right way. You're way too good for him, or any of the other fuckers around Forks. Pardon my French."

" So what you're saying is that I shouldn't date not one of the guys around here?" I asked dubiously.

He looked amused by question but answered seriously anyways. " No, that's not what I'm saying. I'm saying that before you commit to someone…just make sure he's the right one. Be one-hundred-percent positive that he loves you and wants to be with you. Only you. Make sure that all he sees is you, all he breathes is you, all he can think about is you. Just know that you are the first person he thinks of when he gets up in the morning, and the last person he thinks of at night. Know that he worships every part of you, and that he's loved you for as long as he can remember and would lasso the moon for you…"

Somehow, somewhere in his rambling it began to seem like what he was saying was very…personal. It touched me. It gave me so much to think about. I knew that I loved Edward, and everything that he had just said was exactly the way I felt about him…

I placed my finger tips against his cheek and just looked in his eyes for a moment before responding.

" I know Edward. I know. I won't make a mistake like that. That's why I am the way I am with guys. Whenever I've searched for the perfect guy, he never showed. It wasn't until I stopped searching and just let my heart direct me to him naturally, that I had any chance at finding him. The only problem now is…telling him." I whispered the last bit softly. This was such an intimate moment between us. And in that moment, it felt like we weren't just friends anymore. I felt more. I could only hope that he did too.

He looked me straight in the eye and began to speak very lowly. " Bella, I…"

In that instant, his phone began to ring…and ring, and ring, and ring, and ring, until he finally broke away from me and answered it. He had the volume loud and the boat was quiet, so I could hear the person speaking on the other line also.

" Dad? Is everything alright? Wow I'm surprised I even get service out here on the harbor." he chuckled.

" _Edward, you to need listen…there's been a crash. It was Esme's car. We just got a call from the hospital. I know you're with Bella, but I think you should bring her along. Please hurry! No one knows her condition at this point yet…_"

And with that the line went dead. Edward never responded to Carlisle before he hung up. Carlisle was speaking so rapidly that I was surprised that I was able to make out what he was saying. But I didn't even care about that right now. Esme was in a crash! She could be seriously fucking hurt…or worse. No! Don't think that! I couldn't allow myself to do that. Esme was like my fucking mother! I was so panicked that I barely even realize that Edward and I were already running towards his car.

By the time we pulled away from the harbor and onto the highway, I was a mess inside. And most likely it showed on the outside.

I looked towards Edward, who was now speeding down the empty highway, and saw the distress on his face. I grabbed his right hand, which wasn't holding the wheel, and began to rub small, soothing circle with my thumb.

" Bella I'm so sorry about all of thi.." I cut him off before he could speak another word.

" Don't you dare apologize Edward! None of this is your fault, and therefore you have nothing to apologize for." I was practically yelling at him.

When I saw that we passed the sign that told us the hospital was half a mile away, I began to rub Edwards hand more persistently. It didn't go unnoticed by him, because he grabbed my hand and intertwined our fingers. I would have enjoyed it so much more on better conditions.

I was breathing heavily, trying to calm myself. Deep breathes. Deep breathes.

" Bella, you need to calm down. Shh…just relax."

He tried to soothe me for about four minutes. And it was working until I saw that we were pulling into the hospital's parking lot. I was so scared. I got out of the car with shaky legs. I didn't even let Edward open my door for me. His mother was in the hospital and he was concerned about being a gentleman? That's Edward for you, he was perfect. But at the same time…he was anything but.

" We need to know that when we get in there, anything is possible at this point, Bella."

What was he talking about? Oh, I get it. He was telling me that we don't know about Esme's condition just yet, and to be prepared for the worst, if necessary, but hope best. As always…

" I know. Now what we need to do is get our asses in there and be there for Esme! I practically yelled.

And with that we were running hand in hand together, into the E.R…

**A/N: SO THERES THE LONGEST CHAPTER YET. 3,333 WORDS (NOT INCLUDING THE A/N) I HOPE YOU ENJOYED IT, I WAS GOING TO LEAVE IT AT AN INTENSE CLIFFHANGER BUT I DECIDED TO BE NICE…=~) YOU CAN THANK ME BY REVIEWING. **

**REMEMBER THAT I RESPONF TO EVERY SINGLE REVIEW! I LOVE THEM. I LOVE THEM MORE THAN YOU WOULD LOVE EDWARD TO…YEA I'M BULLSHITTING. YOU WOULD LOVE THAT WAY MORE.**

**MAJOR THANKS TO MY BETA BRYONY FOR EDITING AND HER OPINIONS ON THIS STORY. =~)**

**READ. REVIEW. FAVORITE. RECOMMEND. LOVE…**

**OH! AND ONE LAST THING, I PROMISE…I'M GOING ON VACATION THE 15TH****, AND WON'T BE BACK UNTIL THE 28****TH****(I THINK) OF THIS MONTH (AUGUST) SO, THAT MEANS I CAN'T UPDATE FOR THOSE TWO WEEKS…:'( SORRY. BUT I WILL UPDATE CHAPTER 6 BEFORE I LEAVE, AND WILL BE WORKING ON OTHERS WHILE I'M AWAY…**


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